Lays the Eagle Down to Rest
by Soulseeker

Standard disclaimers and copyright apply.
The song used and abused is "Don't Let Go (Love)" by En Vogue.

Natalie Hambert tried to ignore the song in that played in background
and concentrate on her work, but it was no use. She couldn't resist the
urge anymore, she picked up a handful of chips and gulped them down.
Relief flowed over her and allowed her a brief hiatus from her
continuous thoughts of Kermit Knight. Lucien, the annoying bald eagle,
had been playing love songs all night, which was surely meant to torture
her and Kermie. Lucien was always interfering her relationship with
Kermie and Natalie had just about had enough of him.

< Then hold me tight and don't let go, don't let go.
We have the right to lose control. Don't let go.>

Again Natalie's thoughts wondered back to the song and the message it
carried. If Kermie would just let go and stop angsting, they could be
together. She knew they were meant to be together from the first moment
she saw his green little self munching down on flies. He had looked so
cute and so utterly sad. Kermie was cursed with being green and he hated
himself for what it meant to be green. Natalie had always accepted and
loved him, but it wasn't enough, he needed to be freed from his green
curse. She had agreed to help him find a cure, but so far nothing had
worked, not even the bleach bath. Only one person knew how to cure
Kermie, Lucien the bald headed eagle.

< I often tell myself that we could be more than just friends.
I know you think that if we move too soon, it would all end.
I live in misery when you're not around.
And I won't be satisfied till we're taking those vows.>

Kermit was Natalie's one true love and she would do anything to be with
him. Images of a marriage made in the pond flashed in her mind. Vachon,
Animal and Urs were playing a lovely tune - in mid flash Natalies daydream
took on a mind of its own. Instead of Urs singing it was actually
Janette the chicken squawking away "Here comes the pig, short, fat and
in a wig. Natalie Hambert, you'll never have Kermit Knight, because
he'll be all mine tonight."

In the daydream Natalie leaped over a row of guest sheep to reach the
stage where Janette was grinning away. All that could be heard was a
loud, "Umph" and Janette was laying on the ground with her feathers
ruffled and muddy. Natalie was shaken from her daydream state wearing a
satisfied grin.

Natalie couldn't allow them to go on the way they were. It was time she
talked to Lucien and put an end to his constant interference. She would
have taken care of him sooner, but she had promised Kermie that she
would stay away from him. She quickly removed her lab coat and latex
gloves and placed the latest barbecue potato chip salad in a cold
storage unit. Armed with two bags of potato chips and two lab rats she
headed to The Eagle.

Lucien was looking smug and arrogant as usual when Natalie approached
him. She saw his immediate distaste when he noticed the potato chips.

"Good evening Miss Hambert. To what do I owe the pleasure of your

"Lucien. I am here to talk to you about Kermie."

"Oh. And what trouble has Kermit gotten himself into now?"

"I am here to get the cure for Kermie's condition."

"And what makes you think that I am in possession of it, much less that
I would give it to you?"

"Because I can be very convincing."

"You would need to much more then that. Now I am afraid I have tired of
your company so if there is anything else please do get on with it."

"Umph - If you won't give me the cure then the least you can do is to
leave Kermie alone."

"Oh, really? And why would I want do that?"

"Because I can not have a relationship with him with your constant
interfering and threats and I will have my Kermie!

"Your love life or lack there of is hardly my concern."

"Oh it will be unless you leave Kermie alone."

"I think not Miss Hambert. Though it was considerate of you to drop in
and amuse me so."

Natalie's face distorted slightly and a low growl could be heard.
Natalie reached for a handful of chips and gulped them down much to the
horror of Lucien.

"You'll regret that answer, Lucien."

"Oh, really Miss Piggy? And what do you plan to do, eat me?"

A sudden hush fell over the patrons of The Eagle as they sensed the
heightened tension. Natalie Hambert took a step closer to Lucien.

In a tensed voice she replied, "What did you say?"

Lucien could not help grinning with amusement, "You heard me,
Miss Piggy."

"Pig Power!!! Hiiii Yaaaa!!!!" In a flash of anger Natalie delivered a
karate chop to Lucien knocking him flat on the floor. The patrons were
all in shock and scattered about The Eagle in an attempt to avoid the
irate pig. As Natalie glowered over Lucien she noticed her beloved
Kermie staring at her in shock.

"Lucien this is your last warning, leave my Kermie alone!" With that she
signaled to the two rats who had accompanied her to The Eagle. The rats
were quick to obey her. "I want both of you to feed this bag of potato
chips to Lucien until he promises not to bother my Kermie again." The
rats nodded in agreement.

Natalie leaned down and whispered to Lucien, "I will be back for the
cure and next time will not be so nice." She reached in the bag of chips
and pulled a handful and gulped them down. "Mmmm... I know you
will...mmm...enjoy these Lucien, they really are taster then your usual
meal, rats." With that she gracefully got up and walked away and the
rats to began their task which they seemed to be taking a lot of
pleasure in.

As Natalie approached Kermie she smiled triumphantly. "Hi Kermie."

"Umm...Hi Nat."

"Kermie, don't I even get a hello kiss?"

"Huh...sure Nat." Kermit leaned across and lightly kissed Natalie's
salty lips.


"You ready to go home, Nat?"

"With you? Always!"

The End